My cats are geniuses.


I was supposed to be heading to GameCity for the fourth year this weekend, but for various reasons (not feeling particularly well and not having a lot of money or days of holidays left) have meant I am not able to take part like I would have wanted to. So today, I am left at home instead of making the most of my time at the National Videogame Arcade, but unfortunately, that’s life.

Earlier this afternoon, I needed to head out to make a trip to the market. I’m trying to make it a habit now just for price and quality reasons and also for the fact that Leeds Kirkgate market is quite interesting to walk around. There is a lot within a relatively small space. But in getting ready to head to the market earlier, I was once again confronted with the fact my kittens are not particularly bright.

Over the past 3 months, I have been confronted with a few moments where I end up just staring at them thinking: well, that was never going to end well. This morning was one of the best. To give some background, since I have had the kittens, the toilet lid is always down. I set myself into a panic when I first got the kittens worrying they were going to drink the toilet water and poison themselves with the chemicals I use to clean it. I also had to leave it closed at all times because one one of the first days in the flat, Raven tried to jump up and nearly fell into the toilet. So the lid remains down.

This morning, I had opened the lid, and within 5 seconds, Raven had come bolting into the bathroom while I was in the process of getting a few things together. Now, with Raven I can guess what he was trying to do so this wasn’t as funny as it turned out to be. Raven will more often than not jump up onto the toilet and then up onto the top of the cistern to watch me get ready for whatever I am doing. He sits and watches me brush my teeth and do my makeup for work. Every day. So with the lid up today, I assume he was trying to jump up to watch, and with there being no platform to jump up onto the cistern, he ended up in the toilet feet first. Of course, he was out in half a second and running off down the corridor like a shot

I probably smirked a little and got back to it, or I would have gone back to it were it not for the fact that straight afterwards, Oscar had come running into the bathroom. Now, before I lead further into this, Oscar does not spend much time sitting watching me get ready for work. He rarely jumps up onto the toilet, he will come and sit between my feet wherever I am standing in the most awkward way possible. So, I have no idea why today of all days he decided that he was going to jump onto the toilet. But jump he did. Head first. Into the toilet.

Now, by this point, I was pretty close to losing it. I shouldn’t have laughed, but I was definitely close to cracking. What really pushed me over the edge was that when I walked out of the bathroom, still visibly amused, both Raven and Oscar were out in the corridor, both looking at me with looks of utter betrayal as though I had personally offended their ancestors. I completely lost it. I was trying to catch them to dry them off but they were having none of it.

I am a bad mother for laughing.

But it was funny.

I made it up to them by giving them some of the roasted chicken I brought back from the market. They are all good now.

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